Memo to the new Greek government:
May we suggest an easy way to raise a hundred billion dollars. Take ten of the best-known elements of the Greek past and link them to the first ten billionaires on the Forbes list. Offer each billionaire immortality in consideration of ten billion dollars.
1. Invite Carlos Slim Helu to inaugurate the Acropolis as the Carlos Slim Helu Convention Centre. (Net worth: $69 billion, Telecom, Mexico.)
2. Bill Gates will be delighted to enter history as Zeus-Bill-Gates, the Father of the Gods. (Net worth: $56 billion, Microsoft, U.S.)
3. Warren Buffett will not refuse to give his name to the House of Atreus-Buffett. (Net worth: $44 billion, Berkshire Hathaway, U.S.)
4. Bernard Arnault will be honoured to be known henceforth as the discoverer of the Arnault-Oedipus Complex. (Net worth: $41 billion, LVMH, France.)
5. The Greek government will use its influence around the world to make sure that aphrodisiacs will henceforth be known as Amancio-Ortega-stimulants. (Net worth: $37 billion, Zara, Spain.)
6. The Oracle of Delphi will, of course, be the Larry Ellison Oracle. (Net worth: $36 billion, Oracle, U.S.)
7. Eike Batista is not likely to reject the offer to have Mount Olympus-Batista named after him. (Net worth: $30 billion, mining and oil, Brazil.)
8. Stefan Persson will consider ten billion dollars a bargain to become the originator of the Achilles-Persson Heel. (Net worth: $30 billion, H&M, Sweden.)
9. Li Ka-shing can easily afford to pay ten billion dollars to be remembered in future as Apollo-Li Ka-shing. (Net worth: $25 billion, diversified, Hong Kong.)
10. Karl Albrecht will be permitted to use the Hermes icon in his Aldi stores – Hermes is the Greek god of commerce – and will be able to deduct the ten billion as a business expense. (Net worth: $25 Billion, Aldi, Germany.)
