If you lived in Stockholm you would be asked a question, inspired by the British performance artist Joshua Sofaer…
“Do you have a love or relationship problem?
“Are you love sick, or facing divorce? Has your partner stopped listening to you? Do your children disrespect you? Do you have a poor relationship with your parents? Are you grieving someone’s death? Are you sick of being single? Do you have a crush on your boss at work?
“We believe in opera and we think that opera might have a solution for you.
“If you book a private session with one of our singers or musicians, they will come to your home, try to better understand your problem, and proscribe an operatic repertoire with the aim of addressing your particular concern. As well as introducing you to music that you can listen to in your own time, they will perform live for you, as you sit in your most comfortable chair, or even as you rest in bed. This may seem like a gimmick to you, but we are entirely serious.
“Why not give Operahjälpen a try?
“To apply for one of the available slots, please indicate your problem, your address and your preferred performance date, and one of our representatives will contact you to confirm whether or not we can accommodate your request.
“Operahjälpen is for residents of Stockholm. Performances in your home last for about 30 minutes.”
• • • • • •
Three Situations and Cures
Situation One: Identity Crisis as a Result of Infatuation
Cure: Tristan und Isolde
no more Tristan!
no more Isolde!
supreme joy of love
glowing in our breast!
Situation Two: You Need Revenge
Cure: Osmin in the Abduction from the Seraglio
First you’ll be beheaded,
Then you’ll be hanged,
On red-hot spikes,
Finally flayed alive.
Situation Three: Madness Caused by Breach of Promise
Cure: Mad Scene from Lucia di Lammemoor
A harmony celestial, do you not hear?
Ah, the marriage hymn plays!
The ceremony for us draws near! Happiness!
Oh, joy that one feels and does not speak of!
The incense burns!
Brilliant the sacred torches, shining all around!
Here is the minister!
Give me your right hand!
Oh, joyous day!
At last, I am yours, at last you are mine,
to me you have been given by God.
Every pleasure is more grateful,
(it is) to me, with you, more sweet
From peaceful heaven a smile
life to us will be.